W. Bruce Cameron - My First Kiss

About midway through second grade, I decided to take a break from women.

At school, a hot brunette named Barb told me that she would be my girlfriend forever if I would link arms with her and walk the circumference of the playground so that all the second-grade women playing pony would see us. If I elected not to, she would leave me for a boy named Billy. When she put it like that, I didn’t see that I had much choice in the matter and agreed that she should go to Billy.

At home, a hot redhead named Susie O’Dell said she loved me and wanted to marry me. I did not like Susie, I did not like love...