W. BRUCE CAMERON - Dec. 10, 2009

Grandpa Fred

In my opinion, family reunions are best spent with just about anybody but the family. There’s a reason why we all live in different states from one another, and that reason is “outstanding warrants.” It’s also because when we all get together, certain issues that have long been buried rise to the surface, such as, “I really take issue with the fact that several decades ago, you were born.”

This past Thanksgiving, I was chosen to tell Grandpa Fred that he wouldn’t be allowed to carve the turkey because the way he did it reminded people too much of an axe murder.

It’s never really b...