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Articles written by Bob Franken


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  • The Low Barr

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Feb 27, 2020

    President Donald Trump is right that he does “have, as president, the legal right” to meddle in Department of Justice decisions. However, when he makes public comments, or when it can be shown that he has privately discussed any federal criminal case with his Justice subordinates, it should be considered undue interference, and a judge should order that all prosecutions of affected individuals or groups be halted. Furthermore, another count of obstruction of justice should be added to the list of criminal charges he will face when he leaves the...

  • Breaking News

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Feb 20, 2020

    I've ranted about the expression "Breaking News!" before. But like any issue I confront, it only gets worse. So it is with this one. Nowadays, all the networks, without exception, open each and every newscast with that worn-out expression. Obviously, the anchormen and -women have been ordered to start with their robust "BREAKING NEWS" declaration as a way of contriving drama and immediacy, even if the top story happened hours ago. It's the handiwork of the marketing consultants who rule TV reporting, hucksters whose job it is to improve ratings...

  • Trumpster Gangsters

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Feb 13, 2020

    It's not just that Secretary of State Mike Pompeo chewed out NPR reporter Mary Louise Kelly after she dared to ask him questions he didn't like. Nor is it so objectionable that his tirade was saturated with F-bombs. And it certainly is not because she's a woman. When it comes to reporters, Pompeo is not just a misogynist but a mistersogynist. He's an equal opportunity jerk, as evidenced by his decision to block NPR from his plane for his trip to Kyiv. No wonder President Trump likes him so much. He's not your stereotypical diplomat, but he...

  • Schiff for President?

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Feb 6, 2020

    Let's discuss the fantasy that so many desperate Democrats are having. In their minds, they're asking, "Is it too late for Adam Schiff to run for president?" Actually, since his dynamite performance as lead House of Representatives counsel advocating in the Senate for the conviction of Donald Trump and his extrication from the White House, it's not really a secret dream for some in the party who are wholly unimpressed with their mix of wannabes. Schiff has been rattling around the Capitol as a member of the House of Representatives since 2001,...

  • Dallas, The Palace and other Malice

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Jan 30, 2020

    For the kiddies, it'll be necessary to start this rant by explaining that there was an immensely popular TV show called "Dallas" that ran from 1978 through 1991. It traced the escapades of a grossly dysfunctional Texas family dynasty. Now we have the soap opera about a grossly dysfunctional British family dynasty. We could call it "Palace." Where "Dallas" was fiction, "Palace" is stranger than fiction. But there are similarities: The Ewings of South Fork were caught up in intrigue for their entire 13-year show run. In the case of London's...

  • Newsbiz and Showbiz

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Jan 23, 2020

    Pardon my sharing a personal preference, but I don't give a rat's patootie about the opinions of some showbiz notables because, notwithstanding their star power, they usually don't really know what they're talking about. Once, I was covering a political story and a prominent actress who happened to be nearby decided that she would love to express her opinion, ON TV, and expected me to jump at the chance because she was a celeb. So she sent some lackey over to request that I put her on right away. When I politely declined, he escalated that to a...

  • Different Presidents, Same Distractions

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Jan 16, 2020

    The president is smack-dab in the middle of impeachment politics. Suddenly, he orders a bold but perilous military action. His defenders vehemently argue that petty politics is getting in the way of his exercising his hugely important duties as commander in chief. Donald Trump, the 45th president, ordered a fiery drone attack that assassinated Gen. Qassem Soleimani, the leader of Iran's Quds Force. For decades Soleimani was the coordinator for Tehran's proxies and had been responsible for the deaths of hundreds of Americans. While he was a hero...

  • OK, Zoomers

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Jan 9, 2020

    OK, zoomers: Here is your trigger warning. What was the name of Roy Rogers' horse? The answer is Trigger. You were warned. For those who are wondering who in tarnation is Roy Rogers, he called himself the "King of the Cowboys" and was one of the big stars of Western shoot-'em-up movies. Those films really contributed to the cultural mindset that has made us such a gun-totin' country today, which results in one assault weapon massacre after another. If you're wondering who zoomers are, they make up Generation Z, and have barely made it out of...

  • The Role Call The

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Jan 2, 2020

    I don't know if they take attendance in schools anymore. Maybe surveillance cameras, facial recognition and all the other high-tech intrusions make it unnecessary, but back in the day, the teacher would always start out with the roll call. You were expected to announce "here" when your name was called. But there was always one guy who would say "present," just to be different. There is also one in the House of Representatives. Actually, Tulsi Gabbard is not a guy at all; she's a congresswoman, an alleged Democrat from Hawaii. When it came time...

  • Boris and Donald The

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Dec 26, 2019

    How fitting it was that on Friday the 13th, Boris Johnson trundled over to Buckingham Palace and received permission from the queen to form his government. Fitting because it was bad luck for those who had fading hopes of somehow stopping Brexit before it actually happened, and really bad luck for those who put up a fight against Boris Johnson. He’s a serial liar and buffoon, but he had the incredibly good fortune to run against Jeremy Corbin, someone the British people despise even more than Johnson. His Conservatives were pitted against a L...

  • Democrats Are Own Worst Enemy

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Dec 19, 2019

    For a town where friendship is really a matter of expedience, where Best Friends Forever, or "BFF" in kiddie talk, has become "BFT," Best Friends Temporarily, we sure have conjured up many sound bites about friendship. "You want a friend in Washington?" said Harry Truman, "Get a dog." Unless, of course, Fido can get tastier kibbles elsewhere. How about this one? "The enemy of my enemy is my friend." That one captures the transactional nature of geopolitical friendship. Collaborators in one battle can shift to adversaries in an instant. The...

  • Bloomberg: The Power and Pitfalls of Money

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Dec 12, 2019

    This will be sacrilege to "Never Trumpers," but Michael Bloomberg and Donald Trump share some similarities. It is true that Bloomberg's charitable foundation actually does good work, while Donald Trump had to pay a $2 million fine for basically using his for self-promotion. And it is true that Bloomberg has financed gun control efforts, while Trump, as president, has groveled before the National Rifle Association. It is also true that Donald now calls himself a Republican -- in fact, he's taken over the party -- but he has switched between...

  • Charm Offensive vs. Just Offensive

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Dec 5, 2019

    Which of these campaign posters would be better: "Fiona Hill for President" or simply "Fiona!"? Whichever, the Russian foreign affairs specialist has demonstrated that she has what it takes to unite our own badly divided country with her powerful combination of intellect, toughness and charm. Unfortunately, she was born and raised in the United Kingdom, so she doesn't fulfill the constitutional requirement that the chief executive must be a natural born citizen. A Brit who emigrated to the United States to seek opportunity, she found it in...

  • Hillary Playing Nixon

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Reporter|Nov 28, 2019

    Let's return to yesteryear. Richard Nixon, coming off an already bitterly controversial career and countless tangles with the media, had just been beaten in the 1962 campaign to become California governor. He was severely resentful, and snarled at reporters, "You don't have Nixon to kick around anymore." It became known as "the last press conference," and "kick around" ranks right up there as one of the most famous quotes in politics, particularly since just six years later, Nixon was elected president of the United States. Fifty-seven years...

  • Another Bloomberg Dalliance

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Nov 21, 2019

    It's not fair to call Michael Bloomberg just a superrich dilettante. He is, after all, a former mayor of New York City, so he does have some experience as a political officeholder. It is fair to describe Bloomberg as a superrich guy who obviously was looking for something to do, so he decided, "I think I'll dabble in presidential politics." "Let's see. What am I, a Republican or a Democrat? This time around I'll be a Democrat, because that other rich guy is claiming to be a Republican. He's nowhere near as wealthy as I am. That much we know,...

  • Beto's Evaporation

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Nov 14, 2019

    Here's the thing about those bright, shiny human objects that are so irresistible to those of us in media: The truth is that, like so much bling, they are merely fool's gold, soon tarnished by reality. The overexposure reveals that there's little under the gloss, and this "next big thing" is very quickly reduced to "same old, same old." So it was with Beto O'Rourke. He skyrocketed to national fame as the Democrat who almost beat a Republican for US Senate in Texas, which has turned indelibly deep red. But the Republican was Ted Cruz, who has...

  • A Deadly Game

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Nov 7, 2019

    Let's give credit where it's due: As commander in chief, President Donald Trump can claim success for the military operation that took out Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the long-elusive founder of ISIS, who, according to the White House and military sources, blew himself up setting off a vest of explosives that also took the lives of three of his children. This was the president, making his nationally televised announcement: "Last night the United States brought the world's No. 1 terrorist leader to justice. ... He was a sick and depraved man, and now...

  • Finger-Pointing Everywhere

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Oct 31, 2019

    It's really difficult to tell because his hands are so small, but it looks for all the world that President Donald Trump has an extended middle finger raised at, well, all the world. Who knew that he could speak in sign language? Or at least that he knew how to say one word? Come to think of it, it's two words. He seems to have decided on a defiance strategy, his last resort, since his "high crimes" and his low crime of total incompetence are there for everyone to see as he faces impeachment. Every once in a while, he pokes himself in the eye...

  • Happy Birthday, Vlad

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Reporter|Oct 24, 2019

    Vladimir Putin is not a Facebook friend of mine -- that I know of, anyway. He could be, perhaps registered under an alias put out by the Moscow Troll Department, but to my knowledge, I didn't send a "Happy birthday to Vlad" greeting to mark the Russian president's 67th. Nor did Donald Trump send his good wishes, at least not on Facebook, even though Mr. Putin seemingly had a lot to do with his being the American president in the first place. But he didn't really have to mark the occasion. For Putin, Trump has been the gift who keeps on giving...

  • Not Ready for Democracy

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Oct 17, 2019

    In his "Gettysburg Address," Abraham Lincoln described a "government of the people, by the people, for the people." The problem for any democracy is that those people can make a mistake -- a dangerous mistake -- by electing someone who's severely unqualified or a bloomin' nutcase. Look no further than Donald Trump, our president, who possesses the power to wreak terrible damage. In fact, he's doing just that, both with his policies that roll back decades of progress, returning America to a menace to the planet, and even more so with his...

  • Pig Latin

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Oct 10, 2019

    Latin is supposedly a "dead language", meaning no one speaks it as their native tongue. Except attorneys, of course, who use it to make law indecipherable so that they can charge exorbitant billable hours to untangle the messes they create. English, in this era of antisocial media and texting, is on its way to being another dead language. But I digress, which, by the way, is from the Latin "digressum." Let's regressum: Back when kids were forced to suffer through a Latin course in high school, we all were required to ponder the Roman forces...

  • The Shining Example of Cokie Roberts

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Oct 3, 2019

    Let's take a break from our society's normal crudefest for a brief moment to honor civility. Cokie Roberts epitomized civility. She was no pushover -- far from it. When it was required, she was as hard as nails. In today's nasty society, she sometimes needed to be. But somehow, she maneuvered through all of our disagreements in ways that were entirely agreeable. Yes, I know: By now, you might be tired of hearing about Cokie from her colleagues and buddies. But Cokie's life is a symbol of what it will take to prevent the toxic atmosphere from...

  • The Complete Story

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Columnist|Sep 26, 2019

    I always worry when people on one side of an issue praise a story I've done. Ideally, at least in the twisted mind of a journalist, all the parties should be upset. We should be viewed as equal-opportunity jerks. But if one side was filled with praise, was I being fair to the other side? And what does being fair really mean? Can it be defined that we need to bring a 50-50 approach to each report? Should we deliver only "he said, she said" reporting? Should we give equal weight to a known constant liar on one side and the occasional liar on the...

  • Trump and WWE

    Bob Franken, Syndicate Reporter|Sep 19, 2019

    It's a good thing that President Donald Trump has spent time with WrestleMania. He obviously used that experience to finally muscle his way into the main event, when he had been body-slammed aside by the real reality of the devastation from Hurricane Dorian. Yes, I know "muscle" is probably not the first word you'd use when you think of the Trumpster, but there will be no fat-shaming here. Let's leave that to him. It clearly occurred to a few people in the White House, including the big guy, that during the network evening newscasts in the earl...

  • Androids Rule

    Bob Franken|Sep 12, 2019

    I have gotten to the point that every time my cellphone blasts its generic ringtone, I assume it's a robocall. My algorithm favorites are the recorded voices that start out saying, "Can you hear me?" and then pause a few seconds before continuing. I've taken to filling that brief void with a Bronx cheer or some other obnoxious sound. Then I hang up. Sometimes, however, when I check for messages or run into a friend, he or she might say, "I tried to call you, but all I got was you making bad-taste sounds." Worse is when it's a business call or...

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